Lend me your spine

There is no feeling quite as lonely as losing a best friend. It's an emptiness that you can't really explain. You just want to talk to someone about it, to have someone tell you everything's gonna be okay. But the person you want to talk to is the same person you no longer have. You want to laugh and smile and for everything to be normal. But you know it's never going to be just like it was. Even if you try to make it that way, it's impossible. Your life does a 180 and you can't flip it back around on your own. You suddenly find yourself going through your life, with the same struggles you've always had, the same emotions, the same situations, but now they all seem different. We are made for human connection, and once we find it, we hold on with all we've got. We allow ourselves and our lives to merge with other's and we don't even realize it. Until one day, something happens, you fight, you cry, you lose touch, you are alone. The space they once filled in your life is now empty and you didn't even know there was a space there in the first place. And you can do your best to fill the space with other things, with other people. You can distract yourself, pretend nothing's changed, fill your life with surface level fun and surface level people. You can refuse to feel. But at the core of everything, you know. You know and you feel empty. But you just go on, you live life, you try to fix yourself each and every day, until maybe one day you'll brain wash yourself just enough to believe that this was how it was meant to be. Cause if we didn't believe this, wouldn't we all just die from heartache? Life is not easy. No one ever said it would be. But it sure was a lot easier with a friend like you.